The sheep, the dog
and the wolf
The grudge fuck – moral chaos of the undefined animal -
does the sheep get a bone ? why did the wolf not have
the front desk hold his calls ?
PART 1
The conversation
NARRATOR :
The night was hot and sweaty; but how would the wolf know ? he is
between the high thread count sheets in his overly air conditioned hotel room.
The Wolfs fangs had just hit the over stuffed pillows when, for a second, he
mistook the ringing of the telephone for the ringing in his ears. That nights show
at the coliseum had been LOUD and the wolf had his amplifiers volumes turned
up to stun !
It is 3 a.m. as the hotel phone continues to shout. The wolf knew
better but responsibility demanded he pick up the receiver. He recognizes the voice on the
other end of the phone instantly. A
flash of lightning electrifies the room. Followed by the boom of distant thunder.
Ring…. Ring….. ring…..
wolf – what’s up
sheep - she says she wants to come up to my room
wolf – who ?
sheep – our guitar players girl friend
wolf – what ?
sheep – she is so hot man, what should I do
wolf - really ?
sheep – yea what do I do? What would you do ?
wolf – if I were you ?
sheep – yea, listen I gotta call her back, she is close to
the hotel and waiting. I need an answer.
wolf – waiting where ?
sheep – around the corner at a bar.
wolf – hold on – I don’t understand – where is guitar boy ?
Sheep – he has those two sisters in his room
Wolf – the ones from he meet and greet ?
Sheep – and their friend
Wolf – their friend ! Christ, He is such an animal.
sheep – what do you think I should do ?
wolf – um, alright hold on – Lets slow it down – weight the
positives and negatives
sheep – o k, cool, cool
wolf - right, sounds like a grudge fuck
sheep – what does that mean ?
wolf - what do you mean – what does that mean ?
sheep – ( pause )……. I mean what the fuck do you mean ?
wolf – she is pissed at our guitar boy so she is gonna throw
her leg over him by fucking you. If she comes up to your
room it is sure to be a nasty no holds barred sexathon. A
Grudge fuck can be good stuff but, I’m worried you may be
able to hold up your end.
sheep - I don’t think it’s like that. She said she had
always been into me and that her thing with guitar boy was
just to get close to me…………….
wolf - do not tell me you think the only reason she has
been with our guitar player all this time was to get close
to you !
sheep – that is what she said.
Wolf - what are you thinking, this broad is gonna be your
girl friend ? Snap out of it for fucks sake. Listen, it is
classic move. She gets guitar boy back by the ultimate power
move, She bones you, there by one upping him. right, she
humps the singer. In the end she gives both of you the kiss
off and leaves the band in turmoil for her trouble……… I
gotta say I applaud her audacity………though she scores low
in originality.
sheep – what do you think our guitar player would say ?
wolf – would we be having this conversation if you really
cared ?
sheep – ( indignant ) you know he would do it to me !
wolf- no doubt, without thinking twice.
sheep – he will try and fuck anything with a heartbeat.
wolf – and a few things with out…….
Wolf – look, here is the down and dirty, crazy sex for all
the wrong reasons. Weigh that against your guitar player
possibly beating your ass, he never trust you again and
stops talking to you. On second thought that could go into
the positive column actually. The way I see it is simple,
this whole situation boils down to lose a friend vs
potential “ best of ” highlite reel fornication.
sheep – this is by far the best looking girl guitar boy has
ever gone out with. Why is he running around on her ? For
fucks sake did you see those girls he took up to his room ?
Wolf – he is absolutely pathological when it comes to
vagina , never under estimate the power of strange pussy.
Sheep – I think I gotta say no – it is just to crazy
wolf - wait, your saying no ?
sheep – You think I should say yes ? it is complicated
suddenly ? ( angry ) if this were flipped around He would so
do it to me!
wolf – Are you sure your not just sexually frightened of
that girl – Intimated – performance anxiety perhaps
Singer – ( indignant ) no……. not a chance
wolf – shit ! I would be if I were you……… with her motives,
any damn thing could happen in your bedroom.
Singer – umm…. .I gotta call her back
Wolf – she will wait, trust me.
Singer – are you fucking with me ?!
Wolf – come on, this is way to serious to fuck around.
Really, you really want to know what I would do…………………..o.k.
You should have her up to your room. Pull out all the
stops, ,tell her your kinky and you wanna play games, run
with the whole singer thing and put on a big show. Enjoy the
hell out of yourself and tie her up in the process, she will
love it. Give her the high hard one and when you have
wrapped up your man business leave her tied up and call down
grab guitar boys room. Tell him you have to see him right
away. When he gets there you can show them both who they
have been truly dating. For the first time they can really
see who each other are. Really you have done them a favor.
As a matter of fact here is a huge chance they will get back
together or, guitar boy will seriously want to fight you.
Either way it will work itself out from there.
sheep – are you out of your fucking mind !
wolf - too over the top ?
sheep – jesus man what is wrong with you.
wolf – look, it is perfect. Frankly it is a master piece.
You get your freak on, old girl learns a lesson and guitar
boy gets gets a black eye for behaving like a scoundrel. He
isn’t the only one who can act like a dog. This is a great
opportunity for you to flex your singer muscle and show
dominance over the group as it’s leader. really everybody
wins. You just gotta have the balls to pull it off.
sheep – Your fucking crazy! What if……. um….Should I call
guitar boy and tell him first ?
Wolf – ( sarcastic ) hey that sounds like a great idea. What
I think you should remember is the only two people in the
whole world who are gonna know about this… are you and me
and I aint saying shit to nobody.
sheep – really ? Alright I’m calling her.
wolf – hey you know if the guitar player starts beating you
I cant jump in and break it up. At least not until it is
bloody enough to effect our ability to do shows………
( dial tone )
NARRATOR :
The wolf unplugs the phone from the wall and kills the lights. the sound of rain
taps the windows. The brilliance of downtown gives his room a mellow glow. The
wolf feasts on the weakness of the sheep. Closing his eyes and with a gentle smile
the wolf draws power from the mischief and enjoys the idea of himself as a
whirling dervish of subtle mayhem. The dog and the sheep dance at the end of
the puppeteers strings and into the wolfs dreams………..
PART 2
The Take away :
Q. am I going to sleep with my best friends girl friend.
A. ?
The answer to this question has to be a reflex before the
opportunity presents it self. One needs to know where their values lie
before the pussy is actually staring them directly in the face. the almighty
power of the yoni is never to be underestimated and certainly never to be
trusted. This is serious business, for as rock star there will be a lot of rogue
vajayjay throwing itself your way.
PART 3
The white letter ( from the author )
The White Letter remains a vehicle by which I can convey my thoughts or views to SELF
MADE Commanders on subjects of current interest. These letters are not intended to supplant or
duplicate current SELF MADE directives. If the topic requires long term attention, it will
become the subject of, or be incorporated in, an appropriate directive.
The sheep ( omega )
Wait for me
Sheep have a strong instinct to follow the sheep in front of them. When one sheep decides to go
somewhere, the rest of the flock usually follows, even if it is not a good “decision.” For example,
sheep will follow each other to slaughter. If one sheep jumps over a cliff, the others are likely to
follow. Even from birth, lambs are conditioned to follow the older members of the flock. This
instinct is “hard-wired” into sheep. It’s not something they “think” about.
Omegas:
The Omega of the pack is lowest ranking wolf, only higher then the pups. The Omega is
usually a wolf that is either very new to packlife and still learning or a wolf that has been
lowered in rank due to wrong actions. They are usually given the responsibilities of
‘puppy-sitter’, watching over the cubs during group hunts and making sure they don’t
wander into the forest. The Omega may even growl or nip at the learning pups, teaching
them the Way of the Pack and their place within the hierarchy. Ironically, other adult
wolves may growl or nip at the Omega in the same manner for the same reasons. Still
what seems to be ‘bullying’ is much more complicated than it appears. If a pack’s
survival depends on the acceptance of hierarchy, then it is crucial to learn this well and
early.
The singer in the dialog above is a sheep and an omega. As the
lead singer, His natural ability along with the industry standard have
thrust him in the position of leadership. This leadership position is
bestowed without regard to weather the individual has the slightest
capacity for the job. Much of rock n roll is pure instinct. all the homework
and influence in the world can rarely correct an artist with poor instincts,
Regardless of the size of talent. The fact that one is dominant in one
specific area of the science does not automatically mean that that
individual has the capability to dominate in all areas of the science.
Any pack that has an omega in the position of an alpha is bound for chaos
and a general lack of success. When the sheep tries to captain, This
invariably leads to a musical group having a prolonged and constant
identity crisis among a maelstrom of problems.
The dog :
Pack Members:
Not all wolves hold positions, either for being new additions to the pack or not having
defined their abilities yet. The Alpha(s) take great care in selection of which position a
wolf will be allowed to maintain. As the pack members gain time in the pack, their
actions will dictate if they are to be advanced.
the guitar player in our story fits the roll of the dog to
perfection. Behaving as though he is a young teenage boy who, having been
cut loose in a vulva flavored candy store, has his hands in all the jars at
once. Clearly he will insert himself, sans discretion, into any orifice that
winks Into his horizon.
In short the guitar player has achieved the allusion of rock, but
not rock itself. In the case of this dogs behavior it is anemic in its lack of
ability to break ground or provoke thought. True to his nature as a pack
animal the dog is a follower and without the presence of an Alpha animal
quickly becomes a burden to himself and those that surround him. The
dogs strength comes from the middle of the pack lifestyle and living in the
den of mediocrity. The creature finds comfort from cliche and repetition.
The SELF MADE philosophy and its goal rejects the dog as an outdated and
inferior behavioral model. However the philosophy does except the dog and
its role as a vital part of the greater rock n roll eco-system.
Outlier effect :
There is, strangely enough, a twisted positive component to the
guitar players behavior. One that at first is not obvious. One that qualifies,
in a strange way, as to draw ones sense of admiration. It turns out that the
guitar players stunted emotional development has created for himself, a
pathological pelvic need for vaginal volume. This results in a lowering of
the general standard for female fuck-ability across the board. The defect
inversely benefits Girls both young and old who, regardless of body mass
index now have what was here to now an unthinkable experience, the
ability to be on the receiving end of rockstar prick.
The wolf ( alpha )
Alphas:
The Alphas are the most dominate and respected wolves of the pack. If these two
Alphas are not given the respect that they deserve, they will demand it, and if it comes
to fighting, so be it, for disrespect will not be tolerated. If these two Alphas see that
another wolf is not getting respect that they deserve, then they will see that that wolf
does get the respect that he or she deserves. The Alphas try to know what has been
going on between members of the pack and, moreover, between members of other
packs; they try to “keep up with the times.” Alphas have the final say in all decisions,
and it is their duty to do what is good for the pack. Even in personal decisions, they
must do what is best for the pack. This includes hearing the opinions of all the others
and making a decision based on all circumstances. They usually decide what goes on
at any given time in a pack: hunting, exploring, meetings, etc. These two are the most
responsible and reliable wolves of the pack. The female is in charge of females, and the
male is in charge of the males; however, both Alphas will be equally respected by all
wolves, regardless of gender, age, pack, etc.
Through out the kingdom of rock n roll the animal packs run
wild. predators from every direction fight for territory and position in this
forest of fame. Howling, these vocal beasts mark there creative
landscapes.
In this story the wolf,s interaction with the sheep we have An
example of an animal who’s steely eyed devilment make a toy out of his
prey, reminiscent of a cat casually playing with a freshly dead mouse. True
to his breed our wolf is in constant motion searching for prey. An
opportunistic feeder, the first sign of weakness by an individual and, that
individual becomes targeted as prey. Weather through straight forward
aggression or subtle manipulation, the predator moves with purpose and
cunning and will never pass up an opportunity to dominate the field.